JOURNAL LETTER FOR ALL GENEALOGIST COUSINS AND FRIENDS
from Dee Randall

Page Created August 15, 2004
Page either accessed by me or Updated: January 28, 2005
Click for update January 28, 2005

Part 1 - Health

John Henry with Ermah , his wife before her death, and John Averill Randall, their son

January 29th this year brought bad medical news .

Dee & her father-in-law, John Henry Randall October 2004

My husband's father, John Henry Randall after facing medical problems for the previous few months, got a diagnosis of lymphoma cancer. Since that time he has had several hernia operations, 2 stint replacements, orchiectomy (right testicle removed), retina reattched, numerous physicians/oncologists/ophthalmologist/urologist/visiting nurses/physical therapists appointments, rehab stay, numerous CAT and PET scans, dozens of medications, many blood tests/cultures, many catheters and falls. Along with this, house chores and maintenance had to be done and scheduled for his father's house plus the rental house in the back.

May 15 my husband offered his father's residence for sale. His mother and dad had lived on the same property since the 1940's and the house had been in the family since 1853. The house sold the first day at asking price and the house closed July 30. During that period of time, John disposed of 60 years' worth of household goods and resituated his father into a new residence, while keeping the majority of his appointments as well as being there for all chemo appointments. During these 6-7 months, he has been home here in Virginia only a few weeks, a few days at a time. The drive home takes 1 day and one day back, and sometimes he has come home and stayed only 2 days; many times only when there has been an emergency here at home.

As of September 25, after John and me spending time with John's father in Branford, (he had a 79th birthday) even though there is some improvement in his tumor size after 8 rounds of chemo, radiation will begin probably next week, barring any new cancer discovered in the lungs (in question). His other problems with diabetes, vision, heart, kidneys [and more] demands many hours of planning for appointments, tests, arranging transportation, etc.

Updated September 28, 2004:

Spending October 17 thru October 24, a week in CT staying at the apartment of John Henry and attending several physicians appointments/consults, blood and urine testing, radiation appointments, another urine infection appointment with attending appointments and anti-biotics, John returned to CT October 27 for the pulling of a tooth of his father October 28. This necessitated appointment phone calls re the monitoring of his medication Coumadin to prevent bleeding. After the tooth being pulled, he was prescribed another 10 days of a different antibiotic for prevention of infection in his tooth. John was able to get his stent replacement changed to an appropriate date November 5 between his appointments for 4 (weekly) "brain chemo" beginning November 12. We will be going back on November 3rd for his 11-5 stent replacement, returning home, and then John returning November 11 for his first brain chemo injection November 12. One doctor told us that despite the previous chemo treatments and radiation treatments, John Henry was keeping his strength and weight. On the last 3 days we were there he did have acute diarrhea from the last of the radiation treatments, which he was able to control by taking Imodium.

While we were traveling to and from Branford 10-17/10-24 and being in Branford, despite all the appointments, we were able to enjoy ourselves somewhat by spending some leisure hours at Mohegan Casino Crispy Creme reading and eating donuts (not as good as Dunkin' Doughnuts, which we bought a dozen of on our way home - talked into by the clerk - 6 for $4.57; 12 for $5.57.) I finally found a pair of turquoise earrings I preferred - quite inexpensive, but not all were. The Mohegan Casino really is a work of art - as far a casino's go. The architecture is nothing at all like Foxwoods Casino (a neighboring casino also owned by the Indians) which is very bland. If one is not gambling and enjoys this sort of Native Indian modern art/architecture, it is quite astounding.

I was able to spend two afternoons at the Genealogy Library in Branford. There is so much information regarding John's family. I called before I got there and for one particular family surname, the table was loaded with books upon my arrival. I was able to find in an obituary, the name of his 2nd great-grandmother's father, who was b. Between 1790-1800 and where he had lived - NY. I was also able to find the obituaries for a great-grandmother and great-grandfather that there had been discussion as to how they died. I found a bio of a cousin (whom I had heard stories about, but no name attached) who was the proprietor of an Inn, as well as as a Sea Captain. I already had the information that many of his family, as well as direct ancestors, had been captains, but did not know that they had owned some of the ships. I got the names of +/- 14 ships that were owned by them in the early 1800's in Branford.

I will address the food at the assisted-living apartment in terms of what I like vs. dislike. Some of the people do complain about the service, but I found it adequate. The women serving do double-duty, serving and cleaning rooms. They seem quite agreeable to me; one is always good for a laugh. There was quite a choice of juices, iced tea, hot tea, coffee & lemonade for each meal. One could always double order, but hardly anyone does. I liked the hot cereal offered each morning, fresh lettuce salad each lunch and the ice-cream (vanilla & chocolate) offered lunch AND dinner.

Being around assisted-living residents have made me even more thankful for my health. I have to wonder about the past life-styles of the persons living there in comparison to mine; whether many of the apparent problems are due to inherited, environment or "self-inflicted." Even though I am only a few years behind in years of the people there, I'm wondering if when I make up the difference in those 10 years if I will be in such bad shape. Of course, I know I am comparing myself to people in an assisted-living residence and not to persons who are still on their own. Many people there are using walkers. When you go down the hall to the dining room, it is looks like a "parade of walkers."

Updated: 19 December 2004

John's dad has now had 8 chemo treatments at intervals of 3 weeks, 3-1/2 weeks of radiation and 4 rounds of 'brain' chemo which are basically prevention to keep the cancer from spreading. His tests in December showed that the chemo have not spread into the spine and his tumor has shrunk. For all intents and purposes, he is free of cancer at this time. He has many other problems that will keep him and John busy over the coming months, as all cancer patients have to attend to.

PIZZA

http://pizzatherapy.com/sallyfans.htm
Finally got to Sally's Apizza in New Haven. There is nothing like it in this world!
http://pizzatherapy.com/pepe's.htm
Pepe's isn't even a close runner-up.

http://www.yaleherald.com/archive/frosh/2000/blue/p51pizza.html
In the early years of the 20th century (the Pizza Legend goes) Frank Pepe immigrated to New Haven, where he created the first American pizza by putting tomatoes on top of old bake-shop bread. His creation was so successful that in 1925 Pepe opened his first pizzeria on Wooster Street. By 1938, business was booming, the whole family was involved, and Pepe's nephew Sal Consiglio split off and opened his own pizzeria, Sally's. Soon, Pepe had moved out of his original store, now called The Spot, and opened a larger restaurant. Sally's and Pepe's remain locked in their Wooster Street rivalry today, two blocks apart.

When Sal Consiglio died, 2,000 people attended his wake...

Good Review
http://www.sliceny.com/archives/000477.php
Regarding the service referred to in this url, our our male waiter was unusually dressed and looking; we figured he might be a part of the family. There was never a smile. We were not treated with scorn, BUT at the end of the meal, I told him it was the best pizza I'd ever had and he gave me a little smile.
Regarding the lines, we were the first persons in line; 4:50 p.m. Tuesday. The person in line beside us was from Georgia, stopping off at Sally's, then driving on north. They asked me how I liked the pizza as we left --
thumbs up!!

I was able to check out at the Branford library "Art Held Hostage: The Battle over the Barnes Collection" by John Anderson, a book I've been wanting to read, as well as the two sourdough books by Wood that have been unobtainable at my library and a few other "new" non-fiction books not in my local library.

End of Update 10-28-2004

Updated November 12, 2004

Tuesday, November 2, after voting, we left for Baltimore for our yearly physicals. We arrived at our hotel (unnamed) early and tried to get the perfume smell out of the room by out-venting, which did not work, because when we came back, the room still smelled of the perfume, it never lessened.

Tuesday afternoon
We shopped for mattresses and gathered a bag full of literature during the day at several different stores. There is a ton of difference in mattresses; some downright laughable. I would like to have an adjustable bed, but the price is really exorbitant for that lower part of the set-up. Add it to the price of the mattress and you will have price of a good used car.

Tuesday early evening
As we were shopping at the Columbia Mall (1030 Little Patuxent Pky. in Maryland), someone suggested P.F. Chang's which is a chain Chinese restaurant. http://www.cincinnati.com/freetime/dining/reviews/111000_pfchangs.html
We were told that everyone ordered as an appetizer the lettuce wraps (chicken vs. vegetarian) which we did. I ordered Szhesan shrimp & brown rice and John ordered Schezwan pork with white rice. We were unable to order wine due to fasting after 9pm for our physicals the next morning.
I wasn't expecting anything great, so I wasn't 'that' disappointed. The lettuce wraps were nothing more than 4 complete head-lettuce leaves (very inflexible) which you spooned the chicken mix into and tried to wrap the lettuce leaves around it without breaking the leaves. Not that great of a taste. The shrimp were 'mushy." I'm certainly glad that we didn't order anything else (we were thinking of ordering a spinach with garlic side order that was recommended, but this is such a simple thing to make at home, we passed it up). There were few tables with children. We had a booth so it was private, but we had to ask for it, as they wanted to put us in a table in the middle of the room. I would not eat there again.
At http://www.washingtonian.com/dining/Profiles/changs.html Dirt Cheap Eats. Our meal, (appetizer $6.95, shrimp $12.95; pork $10.95; no alcoholic drinks, no coffee or tea, no vegetables, no desserts, including tip was approximately +/- $37.00.

Tuesday evening
I spent a lot of time coughing (from the perfume smell of the motel room) while watching the election returns. There was no "fair and balanced" Fox News to watch. I would assume that was because I was in a Democratic state? No Fox News in Canada either, I'm told.

Wednesday morning
We couldn't sleep during the night because of the smell, so we were up early and arrived at the clinic at 7 instead of 8-8:30. We were the second person(s) there, but we still were not out until approximately 1pm again this year. We asked if next year we could arrive as late as 10 a.m. This way we will not have to stay at a motel, even though we will still be fasting on a 4-hour drive to the clinic. I'm not looking forward to that.

After our *physicals, we knew that we had around 300 miles to drive, so we didn't want to take time for a leisurely lunch, even tho we were in "Little Italy."
We walked over to Vaccaros, http://www.vaccarospastry.com/locations.jsp just a few blocks away for their gelato. I found a Villa ware bowl hand painted in Italy for pasta, but after buying it I realized I probably could've bought it at Costco for much less as I had seen it or similar ones there earlier. Then, of course, I saw several flaws in the ceramic after I got it home. It was the last one on the shelf, so perhaps no one wanted it because of the imperfections.
I had the same flavor gelato as the year before, Chocolate Chocolate Chip; so did John, pistachio. We were a little late in the season, so we ate on our usual outdoor bench, but it was windy and chilly. But a fine, sunny day.

We took off up 'truck-infested' I-95, arriving at John's dad's place about 7:30 p.m.

Thursday
We took JH to get his partial fitted (first fitting.) Then we went to Costco's in Orange as we were close by to do some shopping, but JH was very weary and only sat at the restaurant. He didn't drink or eat anything (pretty tired). We took him home and then we went to BJ's; bought him a 20" TV for his bedroom - outlet didn't work (as of Monday, still no one has come, so John will have to fix it when he returns). Then we came back to Cedar Woods and had dinner there. I probably had the fruit plate for lack of any other inspiration, and always ice cream, chocolate if available. They always say that the vanilla ice cream that is sugarless has a toothpick in it, but I've had the sugarless vanilla without a toothpick - pretty darned tasteless - so I cover my bases and order chocolate.

Friday
Breakfast at the local joint - usual eggs and potatoes and coffee. Totally uninspiring and filling.
John and JH left for the hospital 11:30 a.m. for his stint replacement. JH got in the operating room around 3 and got home about 7 p.m. Since JH had been fasting since the night before, he had lunch after recovery, so John and I went to "Red Tomato" in Madison, CT, for pizza. I had a salad $4.50 (lettuce not fresh, but green; dressing not good, no fresh tomatoes, just cuisinart-ed sliced mushrooms thrown on the greens). We had one large mozz pizza, and John had 2 Red Hook tap beers, nothing to drink for me. Total bill $28.00. Even tho John and JH go to this restaurant, I'd forgo it.

Saturday
Breakfast at Cedar Woods, Hot Oatmeal with Hot Milk, Hot Tea, Cranberry Juice, Bagel & Cream Cheese, Eggs Scrambled; one could gain a lot of weight here.

We walked to the library before lunch (yes, another fruit plate), returning a couple of check-out books, then returned about 2:00 to do some genealogy research on John's family. For dinner, JH was not well enough to go out, so we went to a hamburger place that was rated "best hamburgers," and were not disappointed. I hardly ever eat red meat, but it was organic and tasty; and the fries were not fried in cholesterol-related oil; they were large cut & yummy. John remembers going there when he was in high-school, probably in the very early '60's. He said hamburgers then were 35¢. Vincent's now; Vinny's then. Afterwards we drove to Indian Neck to find Cozy's Pasta Place near the water, then we drove along the big homes overlooking the water which were all lit up; some very gaudy-looking inside and some ostentatious. Then when we went to the drugstore, I found a pint of "Limited Edition - Black Walnut" ice cream. Boy did it taste good! John got his dad a "limited edition" magazine of the "Red Sox." JH is the biggest fan!

Sunday
JH was not feeling well, so we weren't sure whether we would be coming home or not. We ordered his meals to be sent up to him, but he declined his dinner meal for chips and beer. I'm glad that we didn't stay, as he recovered. We left about 9:30 am and had local bagel & egg and coffee, which didn't taste so good this time, as John had been making coffee in the apartment which is better than the coffee at CW. I only drink tea (Lipton's tea bag) there; but the choice is small (3 bags: green, Lipton's & I believe a decaf tea).

On the way out of town (Exit 41), we stopped by Julie's Bakery. We bought quite a bit, but I decided to have their Chocolate Croissant ($1.29) (French: Pan e Chocolat) which is my favorite pastry. When we stopped for lunch in Phillipsburg, New Jersey, at Panera Bread, I bought their Chocolate Croissant for $1.69 -- we both tasted it alongside Julie's and tossed Panera's. Vive le difference! At Panera I had the portabella mushroom & cheese sandwich with a Greek salad. I didn't like the sandwich (but John had had it at another time and so he liked it and ate mine) and the salad was pretty good, but not as good as the last time (at the same place.) This chain restaurant is a great place to get a good sandwich and salad for a very reasonable price.

We shopped at Vitamin Shoppe and I found I.U. 400 Dry E, Elderberry Extract in case I get the flu, and DGL (supports the lining of the stomach and intestinal tract, a unique extract of deglycyrrhizinated licorice widely used in Europe. The glycyrrhizin, a compound associated with high blood pressure -- has been removed).

Update: I think I did get the flu about November 10, but "Every 4 hours I took 2 tsps of elderberry extract which I heard cut back flu symptoms from 7 to 3 days.  I had bought it on our way home in anticipation of possible flu problems. I drank plenty of ginger/lemon and honey tea; and licorice tea; chewable licorice extract; elderberry & zinc cough drops, herb cough drops, vitamin c & aspirin,  steamed my nose, put salonpas patches on my chest and corresponding back area.".
John will not to go to the casino (upon persuasion of …) and be exposed to the flu. This will limit our exposure to the flu.

It is good to be home. Looking forward to some home-cooked meals.

*Physical notes:
This year there were a few talkative persons in the waiting room, making the time pass faster. After arriving and changing, we had our blood tests first, so we could have coffee (decaffeinated - yuk!) and tea with doughnuts, muffins, snacks and juices. Then we settled in watching the election news results and chatting, being called in at various times to take urine, eye exam, lung volume test, EKG, hearing test. I was worried about the lung volume test, but it showed "normal." My blood pressure systolic was 135, but diastolic was 88. My weight was 138.75. My hearing test was good, and I will get the results of the other tests when I receive the report. I discussed a number of things with the doctor; when I asked him to write down the information; he just said that "it will be in the report." I told him that I had stopped taking Aciphex for GERD and was thinking of taking Prilosec. He thought that was a much better idea than trying to "stick it out" as he didn't think it a good idea to have the acid in the esophagus. (I purchased ginger tea and licorice tea and licorice chewable tabs to help my digestive tract. I will also be boiling ginger and using lemon and honey in it for digestion.) He agreed that I could maintain my blood pressure by exercise and diet and weight control, saying that weight control, in his opinion, was foremost. I discussed the lessening of time spent exercising and he seemed to think it within my limits. I'm not sure what I will do about my December 2nd appointment with the internist, nor how I can convince him that I'd like to use only HCTZ for blood pressure. However, perhaps I shouldn't go back to him, as I feel that his previous prescription was not correct for me. I'm afraid if I go to another doctor, I'll not get any better advice. I can't recall what he said to me about statins at this point. I'll have to wait and see what he said in the report. He did mention when he looked at my hands that my fingers showed signs of arthritis. I've been told I have arthritis by almost every doctor I've seen since I was in my 20's. So far I have not had arthritis; I'm almost 70.

Myself
My mammogram has read normal; however, I am not as well satisfied with Lombardi Cancer Center's technical qualifications this year. I will next week have my yearly breast cancer surgeon appointment -- this is nice, as it used to be every 3 months after I had breast cancer for several years. We also have physicals scheduled in Baltimore in October as well. My internist has relocated, so I will be under a new physican's care beginning this month.
Update: November 12, 2004 - New physical turned out very unsatisfactory. What to do!
Update: January 28, 2005 - everything is fine.

I spent 3 months appointments at rehab working thru lymphedema and muscular pain. Driving to and from my appointments was not always easy. Much to my amazement, I have been helped considerably. I say this, because there are very few physical therapists and physicans who understand the lymphedema problem.



My cousin, Cliff Caplinger

On July 23 this year (2004) my paternal cousin died of breast cancer July 23. I have a very special place in my heart for Cliff. He initially sent me his genealogy data base for his side of the family that he had researched and coached my husband and me toward our first computer. This was shortly after my breast cancer and it was a great diversion for me. I'm going to miss his phone calls. He never had pain in his long transition from good health to his death, so we are thankful for that.


Genealogy at its best and worst:
A maternal cousin had an operation reversed (of her own choosing) which has left her in a nursing home for the rest of her life. She was able to get around before the operation. Another cousin called me with her phone number suggesting I call her, but she was not able to talk with me that day and when I asked her when she might be able to talk, she said, "I never know."

Update: A cousin called me with a lot of the subject conversation concerning the above paragraph, and also mentioned another cousin, whom she said she thought was a wonderful person, which led me to believe that the wonderful person probably relayed the above paragraph to her and was the real reason for her call. She said I should keep calling even though she probably was not able to talk at all times, and enumerated the reasons for her not being able to talk. These types of things lead me to believe that a lot of cousins that do not communicate, nor share, are reading my site and "stirring the pot."

Regarding this subject, during the last month I heard from a very close relative letting me know who he is, seing his father's picture on my site. I know that I will never hear from him again. Another very close relative (his close relative also) who I've kept up with all my life, the day he informed me of a close death in the family, he discontinued communication with me. I am not clueless to the needs of this family who express that the matriarch was a good woman whose favorite saying, according to many of her descendants was "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." These heartless, cold descendants cannot acknowledge that she was as mean-spirited as they are. This is the down-side of genealogy.

For every down-side, there is an up-side; for instance, when a dear cousin writes to me just within the last few days: (referring to "the family" which includes a broad-range of family members, not necessarily referring to my previous paragraphs)
For so many years the family has held there secrets and have been ashamed of who they were and where they came from. I am only happy that I have helped to open the way for them to discover and be proud of their ancestors and the contrbution they made as pioneers.

There are family members who are holding pictures of two of our Indian ancestors who do not acknowledge them. Shame! On the other hand, many others have shared so much with me about our ancestry. Blessings to all of you.

Part 2 - Genealogy

I have decided to do no more research on my genealogy since June this year. Any genealogy I do will be on my husband's side of the family. We have received hundreds of pictures to identify and add to John's genealogy. The week of September 20th, we took some more pictures at the Center Cemetery, "Averill" Place, Branford, CT.
During the months of October and November 2004 we were able to find some important ancestors at the Branford Library.

I hope to get some of the other genealogy pictures and pictures of John's and my travels added to my website, as well.

I hope to get hundreds of pictures of my Aunt Ina, (Mother's sister) sorted and added to my website in 2005.

New Contact

During the summer a new paternal cousin [descendant of Gustavus Croston] contacted me. He lives in nearby Front Royal, VA. He is among the most genial paternal cousins I've met. I hope that some time in the future we may become better acquainted. He has extended his hand in friendship and I have not been able to return it -- as life is so askew at this time. I hope he will understand.

Part 3 - Antiques & Other Household Goods

I am a recipient of lots of household goods from the house of John's parents. John's mother died May 2003. Nothing had been disposed of. But as John was in charge of selling and getting rid of all the household goods, several things that the antiques dealers didn't get or want, John brought home. Luckily we had a 8' bed truck to transport them home (two loads full + a couple of carloads). Here are some of the things I liked that we brought home. Page not linked yet.

Household Problems

While John was away, I stopped up the garbage disposal with some meat, so I rigged up a makeshift kitchen in the utility room until he could get home. No plumber was available over the 3-day weekend. During the second night the water-softener came on and all of the flushing water came down through the ceiling and created quite a flood. It will be a long time before the ceilings get re-done.

A two-acre yard to mow in Virginia was another problem while caring for two households. As of September 25, and it still being in the upper 70's, we're looking forward to some cool Fall weather.

Some things not attended to this year 2004

I have tried during the course of this year to think about doing some art again (sumi-e and watercolor) but so far my interest has not caught hold. Perhaps later. Cooking will have to continue to give relief to any creativity I feel.

We are thinking of putting some "things" on eBay, but so far we have not had enough available time together to even get this started. Update December 2004: We put some DVD's on amazon.com instead and have sold all we have put on so far. eBay looks too complicated for me at this time. Perhaps we will put some of our books on amazon.

We have considered taking a small trip this October, first initially to Italy, hoping that my lymphedema would be finalized, but now that it is, John's dad is still not well enough to have the time available needed to plan and take this sort of trip. Perhaps we will take a short trip to Savannah, but I don't know if it can be worked into John's dad's schedule of appointments. As of September 25, I can't see possibly us getting away from appointments until November, if then.
Update November 12 - I can't see getting away now until after the beginning of 2005.
Update December 19 - I can see a possiblity now of getting away this winter due to the rebound of John's father.

We bought a special bottle of wine for our anniversary in March, but so far it has been unopened. Awaiting -- Opened one evening for no reason at all in November. 'twas wonderful!

Page last accessed by me or updated
28 January, 2005